[Oh. He realizes his error now. Mingjue does feel bad about that since it's not something he's considered before. Even weeks later it can be difficult to break old habits and remember they're leading this sect together rather than just him alone.]
I suppose that would have depended on who it was.
[He will just start by being honest there.]
At times I fall into old habits of when I was leader alone.
I appreciate you recognizing that you're not the only leader of the Nie clan. That means a lot.
We ought to have a formal ceremony.
It will also need to be determined how the authority of the Nie clan will be balanced with the authority of his Dominant. It should be discussed with Fenris, and we may need to discuss it with his Dominant. We will need to consider how the matter will be handled if there is any conflict, whether he must follow our ways or the expectations of his Dominant.
[It seems like his apology worked. He's relieved. After all he isn't sure how else he was going to have to phrase things to make it clear he was sorry. Anyway...]
If you would like a formal ceremony I suppose we can arrange that. They are tiresome though.
[He's never enjoyed them. Ugh.]
Fenris didn't show any concerns that there would be issues with his Dominant. I don't see how it will be an issue.
It shows proper respect and recognition to have him formally adopted. It would be like a marriage without a formal ceremony: it indicates that there is cause for shame in the marriage to not have it properly recognized.
[Huaisang understands that his brother doesn't care for formalities. As often as Huaisang discards propriety in this place, he knows the importance of it.]
A Dominant's permission should be asked in this circumstance just as a father's permission should be sought. There must be an agreement in place if conflict should arise.
I've already had conflict with that Dominant. He thinks me power-hungry and cruel, and made efforts to turn Fenris against me.
[Huaisang still thinks that The Iron Bull's delusion on this topic can only be attributed to Meng Yao's influence, and would have preferred to avoid him forever. And now there's every chance that the Bull will think that this is some power grab on Huaisang's part, trying to gain influence over Fenris and drive a wedge between them. It's exhausting.]
I doubt all marriages without formal ceremony are done out of shame. If you want this formal ceremony we can have one but I don't think it necessary.
[Reading the rest of this he thinks on it for a moment before responding.]
If his contract said that he had to obtain permission then he would have informed me. Since he didn't that implies that there is freedom for Fenris to do as he wishes. It will be up to Fenris to decide what the best course of action is.
As for this conflict you have faced, it seems perhaps that is a matter between you two. I don't feel it has any weight to this matter.
[And he refuses to treat Fenris like a Submissive. He's a person.]
[And he really, really doesn't want to have to deal with this. He is worried about the potential conflict of The Iron Bull's authority with the Nie Sect, but having to deal with any of that sounds so awful that Huaisang would rather avoid the whole thing.]
Forget the ceremony, then. He has our approval. That's all that matters.
[So this is a personal matter. He's been wondering about that this whole time. Well, that's between Huaisang and whoever this Dominant is. He won't step in.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
If I had decided to adopt someone into our clan, how would you feel if I made the offer without asking you first?
no subject
I suppose that would have depended on who it was.
[He will just start by being honest there.]
At times I fall into old habits of when I was leader alone.
[He's trying to apologize. Really he is.]
no subject
We ought to have a formal ceremony.
It will also need to be determined how the authority of the Nie clan will be balanced with the authority of his Dominant. It should be discussed with Fenris, and we may need to discuss it with his Dominant. We will need to consider how the matter will be handled if there is any conflict, whether he must follow our ways or the expectations of his Dominant.
no subject
If you would like a formal ceremony I suppose we can arrange that. They are tiresome though.
[He's never enjoyed them. Ugh.]
Fenris didn't show any concerns that there would be issues with his Dominant. I don't see how it will be an issue.
no subject
[Huaisang understands that his brother doesn't care for formalities. As often as Huaisang discards propriety in this place, he knows the importance of it.]
A Dominant's permission should be asked in this circumstance just as a father's permission should be sought. There must be an agreement in place if conflict should arise.
I've already had conflict with that Dominant. He thinks me power-hungry and cruel, and made efforts to turn Fenris against me.
[Huaisang still thinks that The Iron Bull's delusion on this topic can only be attributed to Meng Yao's influence, and would have preferred to avoid him forever. And now there's every chance that the Bull will think that this is some power grab on Huaisang's part, trying to gain influence over Fenris and drive a wedge between them. It's exhausting.]
no subject
[Reading the rest of this he thinks on it for a moment before responding.]
If his contract said that he had to obtain permission then he would have informed me. Since he didn't that implies that there is freedom for Fenris to do as he wishes. It will be up to Fenris to decide what the best course of action is.
As for this conflict you have faced, it seems perhaps that is a matter between you two. I don't feel it has any weight to this matter.
[And he refuses to treat Fenris like a Submissive. He's a person.]
no subject
[And he really, really doesn't want to have to deal with this. He is worried about the potential conflict of The Iron Bull's authority with the Nie Sect, but having to deal with any of that sounds so awful that Huaisang would rather avoid the whole thing.]
Forget the ceremony, then. He has our approval. That's all that matters.
no subject
So you are alright with no ceremony?
no subject
[He'll get a cake.]
no subject
I will leave preparations of that to you. Let me know when we will gather and I will be there.
[Look. His brother is better at planning that stuff than he is.]