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[fanoperator]

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[buttbaby]

We weren't exactly acting on our better natures, either.

[fanoperator]

I don't think there's some better behaved version of me that you're going to like.

[buttbaby]

I don't dislike you, dude.

[fanoperator]

Ok, I don't think there's some better behaved version of me that won't offend you? I don't know how to phrase it. Maybe you weren't acting on your better nature, but I don't think there's a better version of me that will make things go more smoothly.

[buttbaby]

I don't get offended that easily, either. I mean, I don't love being looked down on, but this is hardly a first for me.

[fanoperator]

Okay. What would you like to happen next? Where do you want this to go?

[buttbaby]

I'd kind of like to know what your issue with me is.

[fanoperator]

Why don't you go first, then, what's your issue with me?

[buttbaby]

You think you're better than me.

[fanoperator]

Yeah. That's fair. [Huaisang's aware, to some extent, that he's got a tendency toward being elitist. And Chris' response makes it easier for him to know how to answer Chris' question in turn.] I think you're dumb, and maybe I could deal with someone who was kind and dumb, but you seem like you're both dumb and a jerk. Like people around you get hurt, either accidentally or on purpose.

Why does it annoy you so much that I think you're a dumb jerk? Is your mental image of yourself smart and kind, and you just can't let this go until I also think of you as smart and kind?

[buttbaby]

It doesn't annoy me. I know I'm kind of a dumb jerk, and people around me get hurt, but that's because of my job, not of who I am.

I've been trying to do better.

[fanoperator]

Okay. Then why is it an issue? If I think you're a dumb jerk and you know you're a dumb jerk.

One of my dearest friends is a dumb jerk. Maybe more than one, depending on how we're defining dumb and jerk.

[buttbaby]

I never said it was an issue! You just went and assumed it.

[fanoperator]

...

You know what? I don't think that's true.

If we're agreed that it's fine that you're a dumb jerk, then that's not the problem. But you said you were bothered by me thinking that I'm better than you. If that's something other than me thinking that you're dumb and a jerk, then what is it that bothers you so much about it?

[buttbaby]

You not seeing me as a full person.

[fanoperator]

We'd met for, what, a whole ten minutes before we started getting on each other's nerves? It's impossible to have seen you as a full person at that point. Does anyone ever see anyone else as a full person, or do we only ever see the parts of them that are most relevant to us in particular? [Huaisang doesn't often get the urge to throw philosophy at people, but he can't figure out what Chris wants from him, since apparently 'go our own ways' isn't an option and Huaisang can't become an entirely different person.]

You're accusing me of having assumed things, but you keep telling me what my own opinions are, that I look down on you and I don't see you as a full person. Sounds like you've been assuming a lot of what's going on inside my head.

[buttbaby]

Maybe you've got a point.

It just feels weird, fucking someone who dislikes you.

[fanoperator]

Well, we certainly don't need to fuck again.

[buttbaby]

So you still dislike me?

[fanoperator]

Hm. Yes. 'Sweet' has gotten outweighed again by 'pushy' and 'demanding'.

But sure, if you want to keep going. I originally disliked you because you told me your hobby is mugging people if they act in a way that makes them a 'bad guy', which behaviors include, ironically, mugging people. I disapprove of your arbitrary justice. I dislike that you've given yourself the authority to convict and punish random strangers. Who, further ironically, you certainly aren't seeing as 'full people' before you decide to assault and rob them.

[buttbaby]

Hey, I'm allowed to be a hypocrite. Everyone does it!

[fanoperator]

Absolutely true on both counts.

But it's the beating people up for your hypocrisy that I really don't like. If you want to beat people up for a hobby, go to a boxing gym. If you want to feel morally superior to other people, join a church.

Beating people up on the street in order to feel morally superior is just despicable.

[buttbaby]

I don't beat people up in street to feel morally superior. Not anymore. I only intervene when somebody's in danger: that's how I met Hands. He was getting mugged.

And I only took their money when I was new and didn't have any, but you're right, that was wrong.

[Just, an acceptable wrong, as far as he's concerned.]

[fanoperator]

I imagine Hands is paying you well.

So it's ... no longer a hobby? The beating or the robbing?

[buttbaby]

Nope.